Let be and let go; that’s been the constant reminder in my heart and mind these last couple of months. I’ve felt like God has been wanting me to let go of different situations that I was trying to control or expect things to go my way. It took me a minute to get there, but I slowly started opening my hands and freeing my hands from whatever I was holding onto.
I’m not going to lie, it wasn’t an easy thing and it took me a minute to fully listen and understand that this was weighing me down. That being said, my goodness what an amazing foundation He was setting up for me.
You see, if it hasn’t been clear I’m a single momma, trying to navigate co-parenting under the same roof; but also struggling with my feelings towards my son’s father.
As it’s probably normal, behind all this change and internal journey, I’ve also struggled with the hope of a “happy ending” so to speak. I mean, what parent wants to do this journey alone, wants to have their child grow up in a solo-parent household? But today things finally became clear and all the lights in the house came on to truly see that my happy ending was me and my son.
The weight was lifted, and the doors and windows shut all hope and possibility out. My heart and mind were ready to start fresh again. After some time of grieving and sitting with my thoughts, I realized that God was preparing me for this moment of realization.
The let be and let go wasn’t just about letting go of the control I was trying to have, it was also about letting go of the hope I had of this nonexistent relationship.
Once the lightbulb moment occurred I couldn’t do anything but smile, smile at the fact that my heart was being prepared for this. Did it hurt? Absolutely! Did I cry? 10000% yes! But the clouds didn’t last as long as I thought they would and I started seeing the sun shine on a different future, a beautiful future.
Sometimes life doesn’t end up the way you imagined. There are hopes, desires, and dreams that, while a beautiful possibility, aren’t meant for us. Some people need to leave so that new ones can enter into our lives. There are dreams that we have to let go of so that new ones can be made real.
Of course, it will also take a ton of practice to make sure the door and windows stay shut to the past. It will take practice to not look back and allow that hope back in. But the journey seems a little easier now, the weight has been dropped and the breathing is a little lighter.
So if you’re struggling with something; if you’ve been waiting and waiting on something or someone without any indication that it’s going to happen…just let be and let go.
Let the situation be, let the person be, and let go of everything. Sometimes to have things work out as they need to we have to let go of having control. Sometimes what we imagine and hope for ourselves isn’t the best thing for us. Sometimes…most times…God is helping us let go to allow for something better.
I may not know what that better is, but I’m sure excited to find out. I’m ready for what’s next…the journey of Nathaly and Sebastian…figuring it out a day at a time.
Simply Naty 